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No.10044
7cd95dec2eca2209f36df64df8b2d3b943e5b6519b2506432d608a086941f33c.jpg
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When I was 11 my father sent me to an all boys boarding school in the town instead of the normal school. It was normal school hours so I didn't have to sleep there. I think that's where most of my problems come from. For the 5 years I was there I was never around teen girls, only boys. I became attracted to teen boys, mainly the girly types. But this isn't me, I'm attracted to girls and women. I wonder what it would've been like to have went to the normal school. I have a gaping hole in my soul, there was so much I missed out on in my teen years. Having crushes on girls in my class, asking a girl out on a date, hanging out, dances etc. I'm on the spectrum so I was always alone after school just gaming so never had the confidence to hang out. I just wonder if I wouldn't be attracted to boys as well had I went to a normal school, as they were all that was available. It's like two sides of me are always fighting, the side that likes girls and the side that likes boys. I've had adult relationships with women but I can never get my teen years back and have been wanting to end things since I was 13.
Replies: >>10047 >>10052 >>10055 >>10064 >>10130 >>10148
No.10045 
Well i had always felt that that one highschool friend which had attended to a boarding school before had sexual intentions towards me.And if it will somewhat help to console you i had to spend my 6th and 7th grade years in quarantine and eventhough girls were gentler and shyer at 8th grade they were more hypergamous.Moreover i think u maybe little bit gashlighting yourself upon thinking having missed smthng greater than it really is.
Replies: >>10053
No.10047 
>>10044 (OP) 
Going to be honest it seems like you are just gay but repressing it.  "This isn't me, I'm attracted to girls and women".  Who are you trying to convince?  Also, most people don't have that cliche tv/media version of high school that you are thinking of with crushes and relationships, and parties, and "magic".  Some people do but plenty just kind of ignore it, or don't have the feeling, or they have awkward sex at 15 and think later that "you know what, I wish I hadn't done that, I wish I could have had it happen in a better way.

Not saying that it is like that for everyone, but the experience you are talking about is a cliched ideal that isn't entirely real, certainly not for everyone.  The fact you think being around boys gave you gay thoughts (which aren't you) reinforces the idea that you are building it up as part of your "this made me this way" and "lost out" narrative.

I'm sorry that you have been suicidal since 13 though.
Replies: >>10054
No.10052 
>>10044 (OP) 
Spite will get u nowhere anon.
No.10053 
>>10045
>6, 7 grade in quarantine
omg a real life jartyteen can i see ur butt???
Replies: >>10073
No.10054 
>>10047
I like boys, girls and women but men disgust me, except feminine guys 18/19. If I was gay it would be much simpler.
!t8wcV92YUQ No.10055 
>>10044 (OP) 
It's a condition known as "prison gay". You have been separated from females so you have developed an attraction to girly boys that remind you a minimum of females. 
Doctors prescribe paying a whore in your area for a one nighter and your attraction to males will dim.
No.10056 
holy shit just how many faggots are there on this lolicon imageboard
Replies: >>10059 >>10072
No.10059 
>>10056
Even doe pedophilia encompasses both and every gender actually
No.10064 
>>10044 (OP) 
being attracted to anything feminine doesnt make you a faggot. Why are you acting like your life is over. Stop beating yourself up. But don't embrace it because then you actually are a gay faggot.
No.10072 
>>10056
Lolicon and shotacon are both allowed here. Some are biped.
No.10073
84672a5e6077dfc0ff8ca4d54bfb625be32146c919b24ecb5001d78f409406d8.png
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>>10053
i was in 4th grade during quarantine
Replies: >>10075
No.10075 
>>10073
Lmao real life jartyshotas X_)
No.10130 
>>10044 (OP) 
You're a repressed tranny. You're attraction to the feminine is gender envy. Take the titty skittles already. You'll feel joy when your body starts to bloom. It's never too late.
Replies: >>10131
No.10131 
>>10130
Groomer + projections
No.10148 
>>10044 (OP) 
Just accept you're bi, nothing wrong with liking rl shotas and lolis, enjoy life
No.10156 
its genuinely crazy how pedos are calling fags weird and bad lmfao its like a musty indian calling a white guy a nigger
anyways i dont really think you really missed out on much tbh, i went to all boys schools aswell and whenever people bring up high school relationships its always about how its all meaningless and lasts a month at best
i know this is gonna sound cringe as fuck but femboys might be what youre into since you only knew boys so youre gonna feel closer to them and you also enjoy femininity. tomboys are usually ugly and lean more into trans men than a girl acting boyish
Replies: >>10167
No.10167 
>>10156
Homosexuality serves no purpose and spreads disease
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